I'm a cactus, trying to be a canoe.

I saw my folks earlier.

My Dad asked me if I understood the drawing he emailed to me.
We appear to have a problem here, that boils down to my Dad not being able to use a computer. Luckily, my Mum was around to help him scan the drawing, write the email and hit send. Unluckily, Norton kept telling them it was being blocked because of the size and they didn't have a clue what to do.
Hence my reply to him was, "what drawing?"
It took all of 2 minutes to explain what he meant and that even included a fresh new drawing!

I've almost finished building my barbecue. I have one more layer of bricks, then the top bricks (when I buy then, 'cos I forgot) and it's all done.
It's taken me longer than originally anticipated because basically, I've done the 'little and often' method. And it appears to have paid off.
Remember, it's not quantity that counts, it's quality!!!

I received my cd for the shuffle-a-thon today. I've unwrapped it and skimmed the note, but I haven't played the cd yet. I don't know who it's from, unless it's in the note somewhere, but once I've given the cd a good listen, I'm to put up a review here.

The blogger who received my cd has already posted their review here.
Ironic that the two songs he didn't rate, would be my two favourite of the twelve.

I'm working all over the weekend....
"Booooooooo!"
But, I'm gonna manage to spend some quality time with The Girl....
"Ooer"

I've had a text from the 'ex'.
Why do people do that?

The weekend is here.
Oh joy!

And the world goes round the sun and the memory lives on in the heart.

I love the internet.

Sometime last week, I began to wonder about this, after watching said video once again.
While I was at work yesterday, I surfed around the internet, looking for some kind of "ask a question" type site. I thought I would end up finding a message board, where lots of people give their own answers and interpretations and you never really know if the question's been answered. Instead, what I found was a site that boasted experts in most areas, so I thought it would be a good idea to give them a whirl.
After clicking various menu's, I found the page about Elvis experts. I only expected one, maybe two, but there's loads. You can pick which expert to ask the question to, so I picked the second most 'popular' expert.
I filled in the fields, hit the send button and promptly received an email stating their receipt of my question and my 'expert' would reply to me within 3 days.
A little naive of them perhaps!
What do I find in my 'inbox' this morning??? Only an email from my 'expert' saying she's posted her answer up for me to read.
I click the link, I read my question again....I read her reply....and now I think I may have the answer to something that's been bugging me for over a week now.

Here's the link to my question.

Interesting name?
Cheeky bitch!

I'm just about to validate her answer, by watching the clip a few times.
If I'm not convinced, then I'm afraid I may need a second opinion.
In fact, I think I might do that from work tomorrow.


I've got tickets to see Sandi Thom in October. Sounds like it's gonna be a great intimate gig. I'm currently loving her cd, albeit too short and I love the fact that she proved once again, that there's so much brilliant, unsigned new talent out there.

So currently, I'm making time for Embrace in October, V Festival in August, Sandi Thom in October and Pink in November. I passed on Keane because I'm probably gonna see them at Virgin this year and let's face it, there's only so much bedshaped a person can take, huh?
Now is the time when most of the good tours get announced. I know Muse will tour, so that's another one for me.

Anybody who strolls by here speak French?
Any chance of a translation of this please?

CocoRosie "Bisounours"

Merci x

Beat me black and blue, then turned me into you.

A normal dream for a change.

Well, as normal as mine get, I guess.
On my return from work, I found the front door closed, but not locked. Just thinking myself a forgetful twonk, I proceeded inside to find everything had gone, except my TV.
The entire downstairs had been stripped bare, right down to the wallpaper, curtains and carpets....except my TV. I don't know what it is about my tv that's so unappealing, but for some reason, it was left....all alone.
The whole dream was in black and white.
With no sound, just thought bubbles.

Whilst in the car earlier, I passed a pub and I as I had to stop the car, I looked in the entrance at the big chalked up sign that greeted everybody as that entered.
It said something like:
"Barry welcomes you with a big, friendly smile"
at the bottom was written:
"I hope to see you again real soon"
In the middle was:
"No children in the bar at ANY time. Anybody found causing trouble will be ejected and banned! Anybody found stealing anything from here, or selling stolen good will be reported to the police!"
Surprisingly, it looked quite full.

One of my old customers has died.
His wife came in today, just to sit with me over a coffee to tell me the sad news.
She looked so pale.
So drawn.
It's so sad to hear news like that but it's the best kick-start in the world for making you appreciate your own life just a little bit more.
If there's one thing that's known, it's that we will all one day die.
I hope to have somebody who I love and who loves me around me when it's my time.

At work earlier, I was presented with an envelope with my name on it. Inside were £130 worth of vouchers to spend in a selection of about 30 stores. Needless to say, said vouchers have been redeemed tonight. Well, most of them.
I'm now the proud owner of a new suit and some new shoes.
My shoes have been worn out a good 6 months by now and my suit saw a better day over a year ago. I've been putting the whole 'buy new clothes for work' thing off because I resent buying clothes that I can only wear at work. Not only that, but we have to wear suits and it fucks me off no end because I've always felt like a dressed up prick.

Whilst I was out at the shopping centre, it would have been rude of me not to have a quick mooch around. So I did. This mooching cost me actual money, but I've returned with a new top, some more incense sticks and a weird incense burner thingy.
I'm not sure if I like it in the way that I should. I just thought it was quite unusual and that was enough for me to part with a little more money.

No reply from the email to my folks yet. Damn, what are they doing? It was a simple question, a simple request, no rocket science knowledge required. Perhaps they have to call a 'family meeting' to discuss the probable answers.

I've just had to fill in all my details on a speeding fine notice. I was caught on a speeding camera in December and they finally decided to ask me to own up and pay up. The letter and fine notice came to work because I drive a company registered car and after 20 minutes of me flatly denying it could possibly be me, I realised later on that evening that it was. Because of the length of time it's been, I was considering contesting it and asking them to provide photographic evidence that it was me. I changed my mind after remembering that any photograph they provide may have me driving the car, smiling and pointing at said speed camera, as I was asking my brother, "Ha, is that a speed camera?".

It's horrible when somebody that you know tells you something horrible has just happened to the....and you don't know what to say, except sorry.

Oh, and I've just opened a letter for the previous owner.
She's overdue for her smear test, again.

So lay down, the threat is real.

I asked for some help.
I've emailed my folks for some advice, well my dad really. Earlier, I took some photos of the edging strip that supposed to seal my bath and shower from leaking water. These photos have been attached to an email asking from advice on whether to replace the strip and then seal it, or just use sealer on its own.
I'm expecting an email back soon asking me how to open the attachments!

My dad is the sort of guy who appears to have a knack of 'doing things'. When it comes to fixing things up, plumbing, painting, building, wiring, plastering, you name it, he seems to have the ability to do it and not make it look like a complete fuck up.
He's a little bit like the "You don't wanna do it like that, you wanna do it like this!" character from Harry Enfields old show. That's probably why I don't ask him for advice much. It's almost guaranteed for him to come and take over, which puts me off even mentioning things until I've done them myself.


I do need some advice on the bath seal though, so I've swallowed my pride and took the plunge. What's the betting, when they finally figure out how to open the attachments, they reply with something along the lines of...."Which day this week are you gonna be in....?"

Most of today, I've been surrounded by beauty.

The CD Shuffle-a-thon has been drawn over at swisstoni's place. I don't know who I'm getting my disc from but I'm really looking forward to listening to it. Then listening to it again, then again, then disecting it, then putting it back together, then listening to it one more time, then writing about it.
I felt restricted by only 12 tracks and each night this week, I've been scribbling out songs, then adding to the list, then scrapping the whole thing...and so on....
It appears most people are thinking along the lines of having 12 songs that mean the most to 'them' and also go a little way to describing their personalities. I'd really struggle with that, so after much deliberation, I've decided to be completely random and spontaneous and burn the last 12 tracks that played on my MP3 player on my pc, which is also set to random.
Shit, I hope my recipient doesn't mind a bit of Black Lace, Jive Bunny, The Birdie Song and Jeff Beck's version of "Hi Ho Silver Lining".

Baby, here I am, I'm the man on the scene.

Even the back up plan backfired.

Yesterday didn't quite go according to plan. I did manage to buy most of the things on my list, but actually putting these new items into some kind of physical perspective didn't quite happen.
The barbecue is probably about a third built. Considering I've never actually 'built' anything in my life before, I think it's pretty good. Well, when I say pretty good, the fact that it's still standing the following day is a good sign, huh?
I have however, discovered that mixing concrete is the most boring job in the world. Boring, repetitive and straining on my wrist. So much so, I've now got a nice case of 'tendonitis' in my right arm.
To top that off, all the bending and kneeling down yesterday has nicely fucked up my left knee again. Ever since I hurt it whilst playing 'stupid dumb action man' when we went paintballing last year, it's never been fully recovered.
So today at work, has seen me mostly hobbling around and struggling to write anything down. It was quiet anyway, so I managed to leave just before 4 o'clock, which was nice.

I've got Otis Redding playing now and I think I'm gonna have a sneaky smoke on the back step.

And just when I thought the day was going really crap, The Girl asks me if I can go and see her tonight. She's been working really, really hard and had a lot of crap to deal with, so we didn't think we'd be able to hook up this weekend at all. We hoped, but never expected.
Somehow, she's managed to pull off the impossible.
I'm gonna try my best to pamper her tonight, wine included.

Something keeps getting into my garage.
Sometimes I go in there and find newspapers shredded up and boxed burrowed into. Today, I've gone in there and found loads of soil everywhere. The little fucker (whatever it is) has dug through the corner of a bag of soil I bought yesterday and spread the rest of the contents all over the floor. Luckily I'd used about half of it to repot Marley and the new plant, Aretha, otherwise it could have got very messy.

I wish I could find that bloody book!

Nothing could bring me closer, nothing could bring me near.

The wine I'm drinking tonight looks like piss.

Last night I had a dream about The Girl and Buffy.
Normally this would be very welcome, but considering that most of it involved them telling me to fuck off so they could bump uglies together and it ended with The Girl telling me she'd fallen for the sexy Vampire Slayer bitch and we were no more.
Some of this is probably from the depths of my mind, reminding me of the past and keeping me in check.
A strange dream, all told, especially as they both had exactly the same body, naked.

Earlier, I got so excited about going to Virgin this year, I almost came in my shorts!

Mum's replied to my email.
It was nothing special but at least she replied. She started the email with my full name. I hate that. She's the only person I know who calls me by that name.

I have tickets to see Embrace in October. At least they haven't done the Snow Patrol thing and blown out all the good gig venues for arenas. Pandy and Blue are coming with me. She's never seen them before but Pandy has seen them with me about 5 times now, I think.
I'm still having major problems getting into their latest album, but you can't say I'm not trying!

A guy at work went to see Hard Candy at the cinema last night. A simple "Yes, it's good or no, it's crap" would have sufficed, but instead he decided to tell me a crucial part of the plot. I still wanna see it, so I'll just have to overlook the crucial part of the film that I already know about.
Twat!

Tomorrow, I'm off work.
A day off to myself....oh, what shall I do?
Muwahahahaha.
I have a list.
It's quite a long list.
I'd quite like to be in a position to have crossed most of the items off it by the end of the day.


"That's what keep me down.
To leave, leave it all behind"

'Cos time catches everyone, but the world goes round the sun and the memory lives on.

It's disappointing when mobile phones let you down.

I'm not sure if the fact that my mum hasn't replied to my email has narked me or not. I'm feeling kindof indifferent about it.

Things this week appear to be going good. I'm working lots of hours and had a few sales, The Girl is getting things done, I'm focused on getting a little bit fitter for the V Fest and I have a cool plan of action for my day off this week.
I have quite a few little jobs to do around the house and then I'd like to get started on building my barbecue. I only have to get the bricks now and then I can make a start.
Gotta be ready for the 'Toga' party!


I have a blow up basket ball hoop in the living room.
And that's the only blow up thing I have in the house!

"Baa"
*Shush*

So hush little baby, don't you cry. You know your daddy's bound to die. But all my trials, Lord will soon be over.

A recent fascination of mine.

There's a live clip of Elvis singing "An American Trilogy" from one his famous comeback shows.... he says something to his band (on my copy at 3 mins, 30), just after the flute solo, when his band are about to go out all guns a blazin'.
Anybody know what he says?

I've never really been a fan of Elvis. I always saw him as good looking guy, with an ok voice, who was in the right place at the right time. That's not say he wasn't hugely influential, of course he was and still is. A complete inspirational for loads of people, and rightly so.
His acting was shit though, right?


These last couple of days, I've been thinking about the old hip shaker. I'd like to read more about him, but not the early stuff, the later stuff when his life began to downward spiral.
I love the internet!

The capucinno....the capuccino....the coffee was shit out of the machine at work, I saw The Blagger briefly today, he's looking ok and I miss my girlfriend.

Try this for size....
Bluebell, farm, meadow, dog, spring, daffodil, cat, nature, cow, goat, hyacinth, snake, summer, fawne?, horse, sheep and that funny word. I can't remember what it is but I know there's one there.
The fucker.

The best things come from nowhere, I love you, I don't think you care.

It's been a dull day.

Today was technically The Blaggers last 'official' day at work. He's now gone....for good.
It's not been the same there this last week, while he's been suspended.
I'm gonna miss him at work.

I think it's been almost 5 weeks since I saw my folks. We appear to keep 'missing' each other. I've dropped her an email tonight to let her know how things are and stuff. It feels weird emailing my mum. Weird maybe, but convenient because it means I wont have to face the dreaded phone call that begins with her saying, "Oh, you're still alive then"
Ironic, considering what I wrote about last night.

I'm absolutely loving all the Lily Allen tracks I've downloaded tonight. I think I must all her albums worth by now. She's proper chav, but her songs are just so infectious and instant! Thanks to Joe for pointing me in her direction.
It's street reggae and toasting. It's proper chav and blingin'. But it just sounds so original.
She's definitely somebody I'm gonna check out at V fest.

I'm officially involved in the CD Swap-a-thon over at swisstony's gaff. I'm finding it extremely difficult to narrow this down to just 12 tracks, but I'm giving it my best shot. I will also probably end up doing something controversial like including 13 tracks, just to be an arse!

The plan for the house this week is to replace the seal around the edge of my bath. It's peeling away, is poorly fitted and is a bitch to the wall in the kitchen everytime I take a shower!
I'd also like to make a start on building my Barbecue in the garden as well.

That fucking Pussycat Dolls song wont leave my head lately. The hook in it has dug it's nails well and truly in! I think that makes 3 of their songs that I really like now and considering they look as manufactured as a TonkaToy, I can only conclude they must have a shit hot producer.

Priceless Big Brother moments tonight included:

Glynn "Cows go moo"

Glynn's brilliant conversation in 'nowhere' about masturbation, "If you don't sort yourself out and leave it a long time, it comes out in a stream."

Lea (to Pete), "You're fine one minute then go all funny the next!"
Erm....hello!!!!

Richard "Do you wanna borrow one of my tops Nikki?"
Nikki "No, 'cos they are probably covered in spunk"

The more I watch it, the more I see so much of Jim Carey in Pete.

And the sickest little pleasures keep me going in between pulling teeth.

I was sat out on the back step earlier.

It's swiftly becoming one of my favourite places to pass time.
There's a hug tree in next door's garden, that overhangs my side and when the sun is going down, it just looks amazing.
The air was cool, the gentle breeze was just enough, the tunes were playing in the background and I just sat there and thought.

One of the worries, when you live alone, is how long it would be before somebody missed you enough to be concerned. How long would it be before somebody thought, "hang on a minute, something isn't right here"?
I sat there and wondered how long it would be, if I were to keel over and die, before somebody really missed me.
I could be lying there for days, on my back step before anybody actually turned up to find out where I'd disappeared to. And that's quite scary.
I don't see my neighbours very often, my folks haven't spoken to me for about 3 weeks, my brother Pandy and I always keep in touch, but it can be as long as a week in between our conversations. Work would probably just think I'm pulling a sickie and conversations with friends are on an 'as and when' basis.
Ironically, the person who I think would think something's up quickest, would be the person who I've probably known for the least amount of time.

Marley has a new companion.
Her name will be forthcoming. I'm not quite sure why, but the new plant is definitely a she. Maybe it's because of the sharp leaves that sprout fiercely from her.

Quite a lot has been achieved tonight and the whole weekend was good for me.
Each day for different reasons.

Work in progress:

Who is that upon the stairs, acting like it dont know where.

Day 379 in the bedshaped house .

It's been just over a year since I've had my own place. The time has flown and yet at times....it really dragged.
Buying groceries has been the biggest shock. I find it very difficult to buy things that I know wont go out of date before I get chance to eat them. I've lost count of the amount of milk and bread that I've had to throw away.

Some things have been changed, but there's still so much to do. Most of it used to be put down to lack of funds, but now that isn't such a problem, so the excuse has shifted to lack of time.
This is bad and something I'm gonna work on.
I've decided that I will get something done in the house every week. At least one thing started and finished each week. It may not turn out to be the most practical idea, but I'm gonna give it my best shot.

I've still only really met my one side of neighbours, the Cool As Fuck couple. The 'deaf' couple who live the other side haven't said a word. Mind you, I can't think of many times when we've actually seen each other to speak. They are however, great neighbours who put up with my sometimes over fiddled with volume control.

One of the first things I'd like to get done, is build a Barbecue in the garden. I've said to people for ages that when the weather gets better, I will people around for a 'Toga Party' and it makes sense to mix it with a barbecue as well.

I really like my house and can only hope that it turns out the way I envision it in my head. I always knew it would be hard work. Hard work and money.
I committed to both.

I want it to be casual.

I miss The Blagger, I miss Jewel and I miss The Girl.

And what the hell is it with this, that I saw advertised inbetween Big Brother tonight:

L'Oreal Wrinkle Decrease Collagen Filler

You girls are sooo behind. Us guys have been using filler for ages!

"Big Brother will get back to you".

It's hard to say how I feel in the light. I lost my way, lost my way, my own mind.

So I'm sat here....
Second glass of wine started, second spliff smoked,
Thinking....

It's true what they say about smoking grass. You become more perceptive to things, especially music.
Hell, I'm listening to The Bee Gees right now and I'm loving it!
Oh come on, they did manage to write a mean lyric or two;
"And for once in my life I'm alone, and I gotta let her know, just in time before I go"
"I started a joke, which started the whole world crying"
"I can think of younger days, when living for my life was everything a man could want to do"
"How can you mend a broken heart? How can you stop the rain from coming down?"

And yet the more routine, mundane jobs become some kind of mathematical puzzle, as I found when I went to close the blinds in the conservatory.

Both of my favourite girls are up for eviction in Big Brother this week. Oh Grace, you've let me down, but I think you'll walk and keep some dignity.

I have this strong urge to watch the movie of Salem's Lot.

I'm looking forward to digging out my sketchbook again, if I can find it. It's been a while I've out those pencils to good use.

It's never over. My kingdom for a kiss upon her shoulder.

Things ain't so great tonight.

Earlier today, The Blagger got suspended from work. He has to attend a disciplinary next Monday, but I think that's the Company just playing things by the book even though they've already made their decision.
I'll really miss working with him....

I've not spoken to him much since it all happened, but in a brief call earlier, I said I would help him with his CV, as I've worked in Recruitment before.

The mood at work has been somber all day. It's still very quiet and people are all down because things don't look like they will get much better anytime soon. I wouldn't be surprised if they decided not to replace The Blagger and save on some staffing costs while it's so quiet. This once again fucks up the rota and means everybody putting in extra hours....*sigh*

I can tell I'm mythered today, 'cos when I got back from work, the first thing I did was get changed and start cleaning the house from top to bottom. It's something I do when I've got a lot of things on my mind. It kinda....puts my mind on a mission of clean, clean, clean and deters it from thinking about all the other crap.
Fuck knows what I'm gonna tomorrow, if the mood carries. I've nothing left to clean, no washing to do and the garden is really tidy. Maybe I will work on that elusive third tattoo design. Give me something to bury myself into for a while.

The new guy Drago, decided to show his true colours today. He's not been with us long, so I've not drawn any kinds of opinions on him yet. He seems nice enough, well....seemed.
Earlier today, I went into 3rd Time Lucky's office and caught a conversation between three or four of them. Somewhere along the line, the subject of girl's weight cropped up, to which Drago had the following to say:

"I wont be seen dead with a fat bird. If my girlfriend starts to get a bit podgy, I tell her I'm finishing with her, but string things along....and she gets all stressed about it and stops eating."

What a fucking wanker.
Needless to say my estimations of him have now plummeted through the floor.

So, today has not been a good day.
After the cleaning up fenzy was done, I had a sandwich and then sat on the back step, smoking a spliff, playing with my camera.....



Listening to the tunes....

Closing my eyes....
And remembering....

People go dancing in crowded rooms, my head is getting tired, darkness looms.

Today was boring.

Couple together some of the best weather we've had for ages, with the World Cup football matches and what you have is a combination strong enough to overthrow 95% of the population.
Needless to say, we only had a few people come into the Dealership today. One couple who wanted to know if we have any left hand drive Fords, one guy who was thinking about changing his car in September and a couple who wanted parts.
I can honestly say, they robbed me of 6 hours of my life. Bastards!

I was asked to go out tonight. I declined saying I had to cut the lawn. I'm becoming some horrible domesticated person, now I'm in my own place. I find myself talking to people about gardens, trees and decorating ideas.

And that Gomez track is so clever. The beginning...the banjo type thing hits the chords too early....but it's goes well....it drives the song forward, along with his vocals. Then when it hits again, just before the bridge, it gets delivered just a little too late.
So clever.

I'm currently picking through a bag of Revels, to make sure I don't get the nut or coffee ones and I've just asked for some Big Brother eviction tickets.

Sleep on and dream of her, because its the closest you will get to love.

Compliments can be difficult.

It’s as simple as that. It’s easy to pay somebody else a compliment and it’s lovely to see them go kinda bashful when you say something nice about them, but when it comes down to being the recipient….
It’s a different story.

There must be some people who get compliments all the time and this would maybe build their own confidence up into such a state, that they don’t do the bashful thing, instead they smile and think, “yeah”
Nothing wrong with that.
When you don’t have a great deal of confidence, when your confidence-o-meter reaches .def con 1, compliments from others sound like anything other than praise.
When you've thought of yourself as a bit of a loser, been torn down a peg or two by people who you'd previously trusted, then compliments can be difficult to take.

“Oh twisted child, so ugly, so ugly.”

Your mind almost convinces you that nobody would have anything good to say about you, so when it happens, it doesn't compute. And you find yourself wondering why on earth somebody would say such a thing, cos you've convinced yourself, deep inside that its just not true.

Can you imagine what its like when two such people get together!?!?

So….girls who wear ultra thin white trousers….WHY?

A couple of nights ago, I dreamt that Angelina phoned me up, told me her and Brad were finished and she couldn’t bear to be without me any longer…oh no, I'm getting confused….a couple of nights ago, I dreamt that I worked on a checkout in a supermarket.
I finished serving my customer and looked down at the stuff on the belt, then glanced up to see The Girl who was my next customer. I passed everything through the scanners and struck up a brief conversation with her and when the total was done, I didn’t ask her for the amount, I asked her to marry me.

We got married by the time shed finished packing her bags.

Dreams are weird, huh?

I've recently acquired the latest albums by Orson (like it, like it), Gomez (Brilliant on first few listens), Boy Kill Boy (Excellent!), The Feeling (sounds ok, needs a another few listens), Keane (sounds really good), Tool (such a great voice) and some compilation cds, mostly dance stuff. In fact, ALL dance stuff.

I'm really enjoying the music scene at the moment. There's lots of great stuff out and more promised, so everything's looking cool, cool, cool.

Earlier today at work, I suddenly had a burst of excitement about Virgin. Dunno where it came from, but I had a mooch about the web, looking for sites showing pictures and message boards.

I am officially excited!

It’s still miles away yet, but that just makes the excitement prolong.

After work today, The Blagger and I went for a quickie in the pub. We only had one drink, so that in itself must be some kind of record, but even in that short space of time, we had a good chat. He seemed to get quite a lot off his chest.

Since I've been back, I've cleaned and tidied up a little, then sat in the back garden for a while, reading my latest Q Magazine, smoking a spliff and sipping on some wine. I've also just had a phone call from Pandy, my brother. Once again, he's a little on the 'merry' side and felt compelled to call me to tell me he misses me, he loves me and "when are we gonna get together?".

It's amazing how most of this country comes to a halt when the sun comes out. Apparently, it was 29 degrees celcius outside, which is damn hot for the UK and this in itself probably meant most people were either lazing in their gardens, soaking it up, or in the pubs. England played their first World Cup match today and apparently they won.

I really should be more patriotic!

I've updated the juekbox thingy on the right side-bar with some songs that I had playing while I sat around in the garden.

Free MP3 downloads you say? Hell yeah!

You're not alone....I've come to take you home.

Earlier today, I glanced right.

I pulled to a stop at some traffic light and glanced right. I could see inside the window of somebody's house and on the window sill, were about ten faerie statuettes. I couldn't see any of them in any detail, but even from where I was, I could tell they were all beautiful.

There's something about faeries. Only in the last couple of years, have I found something so magnetic about them.

I want a house with lots of faeries.

I wanted to do a post about my strange relationship with dance music, specifically the anthemic, euphoric stuff, but for some reason I remembered glancing right.

Tomorrow, The Girl has a tough day. I will be thinking about her....

So if you're lonely, you know I'm here waiting for you.

So, the sun was beaming today.

The Blagger said to me earlier that the sun shining, brings out smiles in people. My smiles are because of something else....somebody else.
Words that I never thought I'd hear anybody say to me, ever again.

Pandy, my brother, called my mobile on Friday night. Actually, a more accurate description would be Saturday morning, 2am to be more precise. He does this sometimes, usually after a shitty week at work and some stress and some 'whatever'....and he and his wife Ju have a few drinks and then he feels compelled to ring me a stupid o'clock to tell me how much he misses me and loves me.
Families huh!

3rd Time Lucky decided to call a meeting this morning with everybody. We knew something was up because since he started with us in September, he's only had one or two meetings with all the sales staff before.
We were right....he wants to split the team up. At the moment, we all sell whatever....new cars, used cars...whatever. But he feels that the team and department would function better if we had a more defined structure and has suggested splitting the team into 3 people who are dedicated to new cars and 3 to sell used, which kinda puts me in a weird position because I also not only sell new and used, but also sell to Employee and Motability Customers.
Much of the afternoon saw various people going in and out of his office, presumably to discuss this possible development further. By the end of the day, four of our sales team have said they will now be actively looking for another job.

I'm thinking it wasn't a popular suggestion!

I have almost three months until my next gig fix and this simply won't do. I have therefore made an executive decision and decided to find something to fill this void. The Girl is a virgin, as far as gigging is concerned (if you don't count Jean Michele Jarre when she was a kid) and has even expressed an interest is going to see somebody play live together.
I wonder....does she really know what she's letting herself in for!

I'm still loving Big Brother to the max. The two recent additions to the house appear to be stirring things up in their own special way, which is great to watch. My only peeve is that everybody calls each other "babe", even when they are just about to lay into them.


Tomorrow is the sixth. This would of course be 06/06/06, technically the sign of The Guy Downstairs and I wonder just how many girls are hoping and praying that they don't give birth tomorrow. Or does anybody really give a fuck?!
I can't understand why somebody has taken the decision to remake The Omen. Such a great film that should have been left alone, but no.....noooooo, somebody thinks they can do a better version.
Piss poor remakes are pointless and a crap idea, unless it's undertaken with a fresh pair of eyes and a new slant on the original storyline. Remaking The Omen for me, would be as disastrous as somebody remaking The Rocky Horror Picture Show. If anybody ever does that, then I shall take a vow to never watch films again and simply give up hope on the entire film industry.

A guy came in earlier. I chatted to him for a while, then we sat down at my desk. The first ten minutes of our conversation were about which car he wanted, the remaining 30 minutes were about how relieved he was when his wife of 40 years left him.

Strange world, huh?

You're always brilliant in the morning, smoking your cigarette and talking....over coffee.

He strives to be....

believed,
understood to the point of being
astonishing.

wanted,
And when taken away....
missed so much.

liked,
enough to be introduced into the circle
the circle of life.

accepted,
for who he is and what he stands for,
which is nothing more than he can give.

loved,
unconditionally and with open heart
and open mind and an open future.

touched,
in a way that shows the care
of a soul that's in repair.

kissed,
with a silent song
and silent lips that reveal everything.

held,
with arms that wrap away the past
and reflect the future

needed,
like a song needs a voice
and a violin needs a bow.

Screaming inside....turning inside....

Once again, the whole 'reading while you're taking a dump' thing rears it's ugly head.

While I was away over the weekend, I get a call on my mobile.
It's The Blagger:

The Blagger, "Do you mind if I open up your freshly delivered Q Magazine?"
bedshaped, "Yeah, 'course you can. Why, does it look like a good issue?"
The Blagger, "Dunno, I just wanna take a dump."

There are some things in this world that I'll never understand.

I wondered out in the world for years, but you just stayed in your room.

A hot bath with lovely soft bubbles solves everything.
Well, not quite.

So....hairs on toes....what's that all about?
It's not something I've noticed on girls, so it's either a case of Mother Nature once again being unkind to guys and having hairs grow in all the unwanted places or they are those lovely fine hairs that are there, but almost invisible to the eye. Of course, girls could do the whole hair removal thing, in which case us guys would never be any the wiser.

Whilst I was in the bath, I noticed mine are dark and fairly lengthy. When I say fairly lengthy, I'm talking a few centimeters. While this may be completely normal, once again, it's not something I've been able to compare on other guys. I mean....when would one have an opportunity to compare toe hair length on another guy?
The conclusion I've come to is that I don't like them. I will have to either accept them as they are and turn a blind eye, although I have now noticed that they are there now and this may be somewhat difficult, or I could always get rid of them.

Why did Mother Nature build guys in such a way that hair tends to grow from or out of the most inappropriate places! When I was a kid, I used to scoff at the TV adverts showing those electric hair clippers for noses, ears and the like, but it appears that they do indeed serve a purpose and aren't in fact just for the abnormally hairy blokes, as I used to think.
I will however, never buy such an item.
Resist, resist!

Earlier, I spent some time in the back garden. This was long overdue because the grass and weeds were resembling an overgrown jungle and were it not for the wild animals taking shade in the long grass, I may have held out even longer.
After almost three hours of mowing, strimming, sweeping and cutting back, it now looks almost like a decent back garden. Of course, it will never look as good as either of my neighbours, who appear to be running in some competition for the most perfectly presented garden, what with their grass that resembles a golf course green and flowers that look like something straight out of a book.

I have made a mental note though....After hours of using my Hover Mower that doesn't hover and my strimmer that is about as useful as whipping the grass and weeds with a piece if string, I get the shakes.
The shakes are not a good thing to have when you're in the bath and decide to have a shave and a preen, especially if you want to tidy up your downstairs garden!