Monday, January 8

This town ain't big enough for both of us. And it ain't me who's gonna leave.

What can't people do what they're supposed to do?

Sometime early December:
bedshaped, "Yeah, hi. I'm just checking to see how my application is doing, for the extra money?"
Department One, "Right, let me see for you. Oh yes, it's all looking fine. You're known as Low Risk so everything that end is sorted out. Next you will get your confirmation Documents sent out, just return them and then we can release the funds to you"
bedshaped, "Great, thanks a lot"

Mid December:
bedshaped, "Hi, I haven't received my Doc's to sign."
Department One, "Hmmmm, let me transfer you to Department Two because the loan amount we have differs to what you're telling me. Maybe they can help."
Department Two, "Hi, how can I help?"
bedshaped, "Well, I've been transfered to you because Department One can't proceed any further without confirmation from you that the loan amount was changed."
Department Two, "Right. I will send them a message saying that's fine."
bedshaped, "Thanks. How much longer now?"
Department Two, "Oh, not long, They will send you the Doc's to sign and return, then they release the funds."
bedshaped, "Cool"

End of December:
bedshaped, "Hi, I still haven't received my Doc's to sign."
Department One, "We have a difference in the loan amount. Have you reduced it?
bedshaped, "Yes, ages ago and Department Two have confirmed this with you."
Department One, "No I'm sorry, they haven't. We need that next to proceed. Let me transfer you to speak to them"
Department Two, "Hi, how can I help?"
bedshaped, "Department One say they STILL haven't received anything from you confirming change of loan amount."
Department Two, "Oh right, let's see. Oh we need something else off you yet. A letter stating blah blah blah."
bedshaped, "A letter, right? I can do that now and send it today. Then what?"
Department Two, "Then we can confirm amount chaange with Department One and they can send you the Doc's to sign and return then release the funds."

The letter goes off the same day.

Beginning of January:
bedshaped, "Hi, what's going on? I've heard NOTHING"
Department One, "Department Two need to confirm the loan amount changing, then we can proceed. Let me transfer you to them to find out why they haven't done it"
Department Two, "Hi, how can I help?
bedshaped, "What the fu...Hi, can you tell me what's happening?"
Department Two, "Yes, Department One need confirmation from us that the loan amount is changed."
bedshaped, "Ok, so why hasn't that been done, for the last 3 weeks?"
Department Two, "I can't say. What needs to happen now is we need to cinfirm the amount of loan to them. This will be done by your original agent who you spoke to."
bedshaped, "Look, I've never even spoken to him since day one back in November. Everything has been messed up as far as I'm concerned. It's been going on since blah blah blah. You told me in December blah blah blah. I've been passed from one department to another, both of whom seem incapable of holding a conversation with each other. Blah Blah Blah."

The guy on the end of the phone then told me he'd done it. He'd sent Department One the information. 15 minutes later, I called Department One to confirm this and they said yes.
The next 48 hours are gonna drag like a bitch.

Be thankful, this is a very condensed and edited version of my relationship with the money people.

2 parlez:

x said...

money people are monstrous. and they never answer their own phones. there is always some extension you don't know. here in greece you wait forever to talk to them, while listening to muzak.

Cat said...

The worst thing is that you are entirely at their mercy - they have something you need, thus you have to play their game. C*nts.

(Money, Money, Money - ABBA)