Day one.

I guess I should begin with my reasons for starting this blog.
I've always written things down or kept some sort of journal. I find it a good way to vent, ponder, dream and reflect. Over the years I've written on several different journal/blog sites but for one reason or another, I've ended up deleting them.
I still write in Deadjournal, which is a place where I lay down my thoughts more than anything else, but there are some people who read it who make it difficult for me to show my bones.
I don't think this blog is a replacement, or at least that's not my intention at all.
Last year, 2004 was a shit year for me. I think I suffered every kind of emotion possible and even at the end of it all, I can honestly say that I learnt nothing about myself except I deserved every last spike in my chest.
Not being an optimistic kind of guy, I'm reluctant to say this year is gonna be so much better, so I'll settle in hoping it's gonna be no worse.
It will certainly have some big changes for me.
Currently faced with an expired welcome time living at my parents house, I'm very soon to embark on finding a place of my own. Although I'm desperately aware that I need my own space, this will be the first time I've lived alone and I'd be a liar if I said it didn't scare the shit out of me.
My only companions on this imminent journey will be Jewel, my cat and Leon, my houseplant, who is looking decidedly frail, poor little guy.
Over the coming weeks, months or even years that I continue writing here, I'm sure I will write more about our adventures together, past, present and future.
I can't say I hate my current job, I don't. I just hate the fact I've once again allowed myself to be sucked up into a rat-race company. Although I don't hate my job, it's not the most enjoyable job in the world. It's not the job itself, it's more down to the people I work with, which includes both my work colleagues and members of the public.
I sell cars for a major car manufacturer. I don't sell used cars, only new, so I'm not quite in the league of the picture you just conjured of me in my Arthur Daley tweed suit. I don't bullshit my way to get a sale, I don't rip people off, I treat my customers the way I'd like to be treated. Unfortunately, a car salesman is almost on the same level as an estate agent or a traffic warden in Joe Publics eyes.
Being completely disillusioned with my current occupation, I've decided that this year will mean making some rather large decisions, particularly in the work area. I'm still undecided which direction to take, but I'm beginning to weigh up the pros and cons of working for myself. Initial research suggests it's a bit of a minefield, so there's plenty more digging for me to do before I can make a more informed judgement, but not having a boss to answer to is certainly appealing to me.
So yeah, that's my goal.
So returning to the beginning of this entry, my reasons for starting this blog are quite simply somewhere I can talk about my journey.